So you have no idea what an elopement ceremony looks like...
And how could you?! We've all been to our fair share of traditional ceremonies, but elopements are purposefully intimate with only a few (or often ZERO) guests. So naturally your exposure to these ceremonies is probably next to nothing.
"What do we do for our ceremony?" is one of the most common questions I get as an elopement photographer. The true answer: ANYTHING. However, that's not exactly helpful. So here is a list of elopement ceremony ideas for you, but it is by no means exhaustive. These ideas can be used with or without an officiant present. Let yourself be inspired by these ideas and don't be afraid to add your own personal touches!
1. Ring Warming
During this ritual, the wedding rings are passed around to the guests, who take a moment to hold them and imbue them with their good wishes, blessings, and positive thoughts for the couple's future. The rings are then returned to the officiant or the couple, who proceed with the ring exchange part of the ceremony. It allows close family and friends to participate in a personal and heartfelt way, contributing to the symbolic power and significance of the rings the couple will wear.
Fun fact: ring warming is very close to my heart because I did this in my own elopement ceremony. It's such a comfort to me that my mother, who has since passed away, held our rings and imbued them with her love. I feel like it's a physical tether to our loved ones.
2. Read a Passage or Poetry
There are endless possibilities here. Your reading could be religious, it could be from a book you both love, a poem that moves you, or even movie lines that make you laugh. Selecting a text that resonates with you as a couple can add a deeply personal touch. It might reflect your love story, shared interests, or values, making the ceremony uniquely yours. Or perhaps you each pick out a passage to surprise each other with during your vows!
3. Family Vows
If you have a small number of guests, you can invite them to be a part of the ceremony with family vows. They group can respond as a collective (example: saying "We do" in response to an officiant asking if this group will do their best to support the couple) or as individuals. This is particularly meaningful in ceremonies where children from previous relationships are involved or when the couple wants to emphasize the blending of their families.
Abby and Keeler invited their nieces and nephews to be a part of their ceremony.
4. Handfasting
Ready to literally "tie the knot?" Handfasting is a symbolic ritual where the couple's hands are bound together with a cord, ribbon, or cloth. This act symbolizes their union and commitment to each other. The tradition has roots in ancient Celtic and other European cultures and has been adapted in various forms across different cultures and modern weddings.
5. Altered Religious Traditions
So many religions have beautiful marriage ceremonies! Some couples may want to incorporate a nod to their faith or culture without the full-blown traditional production. Consider creating an abbreviated version with only the words and/or movements that you believe in. Leave the problematic parts behind and take what moves you.
Alex wanted to honor his roots by breaking the glass, a Jewish wedding tradition.
6. Create Art
Make something together! It could be temporary like a mandala, or something permanent like a painting that you can display in your home afterwards. Pouring different colored sand into a container (like a glass vase) is another way to create a visually striking symbol that signifies the inseparability of your lives. Etsy has some cool sand unity kits! The options here are endless: make pottery together, forge your rings in a blacksmith shop, make friendship bracelets, and on and on.
Tiffane and Mogan created a mandala together. They used objects that were meaningful to them, lit candles, and said prayers during its creation.
7. Read Private Vows
If you want to have guests but hate the idea of spilling your guts in front of your soon-to-be in-laws, consider reading your vows privately during a separate part of the day. You can still have a more scripted ceremony with loved ones present that doesn't involve revealing your very personal emotions (and probably tears).
8. Read Letters from Loved Ones
Letters from loved ones can allow you to feel the presence and support of family and friends, even if they are not physically there. Ask your loved ones to get you their letters a few weeks in advance of your elopement. You can ask them to offer blessings, advice, words of wisdom for your journey ahead, personal stories and memories. Those letters become cherished keepsakes you can revisit throughout your life.
9. Exchange Jewelry or Gifts
A traditional ring exchange is a classic and meaningful part of a wedding ceremony, including elopements. But don't stop at rings! You can exchange any kind of jewelry (necklaces, watches, bracelets, earrings), or just exchange gifts (books, wine, or anything else you'd like!).
10. Plant Something
This one is location dependent (don't go planting things in national parks), or could be a nice thing to do once you get home from your elopement to seal the experience. Planting a tree or plant symbolizes your commitment to nurture your relationship, your desire to put down roots, and your new beginning. It's a living reminder of your love that you can watch flourish over the years.
In conclusion: you are committing to a lifetime with your person, and you can express your love and commitment however you see fit. The sky is the limit for your ceremony!
